Heart of Wisdom Academy

*Nicki Truesdell*

Today, I reminded Peyton not to compare. When we compare ourselves against others we either feel proud or inferior; better or worse. Someone recently asked her what math she is in. She said she was embarrassed to say Pre-Algebra. The person that asked her was 3 years younger and doing Calculus. 
I know at this age it seems like such a big deal. I keep impressing on them that when they're adults no one cares. Genesis feels insecure about her reading. She doesn't know that when she goes for a job interview literally no one cares if she learned to read at 5 or 15.

Learning differences and learning difficulties are hard. As a mom, I know how much harder it would be if they were in public/private school. I know the bullying kids face when they learn differently or they're "slow". I know how agonizing it would be to have lessons move at such a fast pace. I know how lost they'd be when the teacher has to move on to the next concept when they never mastered the last one. I know how distracted they'd be by friends, enemies, frienemies cliques, boys, fashion, gossip, drama, etc. etc. etc. It would be harder. But they don't know that. This is their hard. I meet them where they are. 

For the record, I couldn't do this math problem at her age. I couldn't do this math problem 2 years ago. I constantly share the million reads why none of this matters.

 

This is my beautiful, sweet, daughter Peyton (aka "Baby Baller Cakes") at 2 months shy of 8 years old. I tell her all the time how glad I am that God gave her to me. I absolutely love her to pieces. She is caring, attentive, protective, creative, inquisitive, athletic, joyful, and helpful.
 I have shared in the past her learning difficulties:

• expressive/reflexive language disorder
• reading/writing disorder
• extremely low IQ -borderline range
• extremely poor working memory
• extremely poor short-term memory
• extreme difficulty with memory retrieval

 She progresses slowly, but this is the first year where she has had virtually no academic progress. Her and her twin Kaden have similar learning struggles: they both receive the same therapy twice a week, his IQ is equally low (in fact lower), and their initial academic assessments were very similar; however, there is one major difference. He does not have the memory problems that she has. And for that reason alone he is has been able to progress academically where she hasn't.
For the last several years we've acknowledged that there is a learning disability, but it has become very clear this year that the real problem is memory. No matter who teachers her, what curriculum is used, or what building she's in; her brain goes with her everywhere. Her brain literally does a factory reset every couple of months, and start all over again reteaching everything. Unfortunately her therapists haven't worked with a child with these types of memory problems so we're all trying to learn together.

What God whispers to my heart:

• If Jesus is all my little girl will ever know, is that enough for you? 
• You value knowledge more than wisdom
• The Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed-or indeed only one. Luke 10:41
• Do you want Peyton to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death? Is that your goal for your little girl? Phil. 3:10
• How willing are you to stand alone like Noah in obedience to Me in the face of mockery, ridicule, sneers, gossip, judgement, misunderstandings? (see I can get concerned, b/c my daughter stands alone in class as the only child that can't read. I stand alone in my homeschool community as the mom who's kid "still" can't read) 
• Spend your time grieving over what God grieves over. And God isn't in heaven grieving over my kids' academic scores or my daughters memory. He's grieves over sin and the lost.
• When we measure ourselves by ourselves and compare ourselves with ourselves, we are not wise. 2Cor 10:12  That is what an IQ test does after-all. Comparing my child with other children and creating a norm, when the only norm is that we're all unique. 
• "We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand. Isaiah 64:8  
• In a large house there are articles not only of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay; some are for special purposes and some for common use. 2 Timothy 2:20  Every child is unique, some he created to
• God has challenged my view of success
• Success in homeschool doesn't mean having the smartest kids, the highest test scores, and dual-enrollment to prove it all.

What's the plan for next year:

• receptive-expressive language disorder
• articulation disorder (Kaden only)
• reading disorder
• written language disorder
• working memory impairment
• abnormal auditory perception/phonemic processing delay (Peyton only)

• I have Horizons Math K at home, so we picked that up this week. They both enjoyed having color for a change, since we usually do Math U See. Think we'll continue slowly with Horizons
• Kyle and I started the City of Ember Trilogy and Gregor the Overlander Series. We both have really gotten into the City of Ember. I picked Gregor the Overlander because I was so enthralled with The Hunger Games Trilogy that I wanted to read everything by the author. So far, I'm unimpressed, but we're only 2 chapters in. I'll let you know if anything changes. 
• Kyle is learning how to use outlines to create compositions
• I listened to some seminars by Andrew Pudewa from the Institute of Excellence in Writing. I was very impressed with 

Homeschooling is not for the faint of heart! There are a lot of different challenges. If my kids were "in school" life wouldn't "interrupt" our school day: sick days, doctor appointments, dentist appointments, laundry, cooking, cleaning, organizing, car maintenance, house maintenance, new babies, fatigue etc. etc. etc. None of those things would effect my children's school day or my teaching if they were gone all day. But, by God's blessed grace we are all home together learning and being flexible and working through the challenges together as we grow in patience, humility, and flexibility, faith, and wisdom. Do you know how much God has taught me by having the children underfoot during all these times? Can you imagine how much God has taught them?

The most recent challenge we're working through is learning disabilities. I recently confessed to my sister, that I always thought that learning disabilities weren't real. I thought that the kids just watched to much TV/Video Games and didn't have good academic support at home. So I was just caught off guard with the twins learning challenges. I thought, "But they come from a good home, with little TV and lots of books, this doesn't happen to kids like that". At times, I have gone through and still go through intense feelings of guilt, helplessness, and faithlessness. But God is using the the twins learning differences to grow my faith and trust in him. Someone recently told me that God made my children, each one individually. HE made their brains, and he didn't make a mistake! But that's how I've been feeling, I've been feeling like...but this is a mistake...something is wrong with them....But I was wrong, these children are fearfully and wonderfully made. The Lord is leading me with gentle cords of compassion to live out all of those "one another scriptures" with all of my children...The tide is turning is my home and in my heart as I live out these scriptures most especially with my "special children". Live out these scriptures with your children....